Ok, so let me strike down the idea that neurotypical people are risky and bad to have as friends.
To presume that neurotypical people are inherently stronger and more equipped to fill the role of “friend” is baseless; even in cases where one is expected to respond in a certain way during a time of crisis. Those who don’t attend to mental turmoil on a daily basis might not be as prepared to be your “rock,” compared to those who do deal with mental disparity. Stability shouldn’t be conceived as a stand-in for strength or a measure of “goodness,” the depth of mental and emotional experience is something valuable to confer upon another, even if unreliable.
Stability, on one hand, is a poor parameter for judging what a good friend is. The strength and perspective gleaned from life experience exceed that of some other neurotypical people (that is, the coping mechanisms they have developed from trial and error, the familiarity of certain kinds of emotions.). Still yet, a hypothetically constant state—that is a “stable state” —of depression, anxiety, and so on still exist in such a way that brings a useful vantage-point for assisting others in their struggles. Beyond the mere psychological utility, I find that sometimes such conditions give rise to compassion by virtue of heightened sensitivity to and receptivity of others.
I have come to terms recently with the fact that I am not “grounded,” I’m not naturally in one place, but I am “grounding.” In the constant flux of my emotions, I am tasked with centering myself and using my arsenal of tactics to make my days bearable; I have formulated ways to bring about resilience to ground myself.
What I mean to say in all of this is that those who are “grounded” do not necessarily have any greater value as a friend than I do, or people like me. Even those quite dissimilar to me in other dimensions of mental illness.
To conclude, I love my friends. They constantly inspire me. This all comes from a place of observing shitty attitudes towards people dealing with mental illness in the social sphere.