My sister and I were raised Quaker— pacifism is one of its most important tenets.
For me, pacifism means I don’t believe violence to be a valuable form of resistance against a much larger power. Being against violence as self-defense completely misses the point. A huge part of being peaceful is learning and practicing nonviolent communication—you can’t just “not do violence” and be done with it.
I honestly think that the strict form of pacifism—that some people confuse with what I’m talking about—came from back in the day when drunk hyper-masculine men ran the streets and it was revolutionary to not get into fights about who’s pink dick was smaller. That type of pacifism won’t work for a queer femme of color—it’s about moving through the world in a loving, compassionate way and acting accordingly in all I do.